Ain’t I A Woman: Safia Pulliam
Hi my name is Safia I’m a woman who has grown from girlhood to womanhood in ways I never imagined. I come from humble beginnings in Gary, Indiana. A place that’s cold, hard, but deeply rooted in integrity, consistency, hard work and most of all faith. These characteristics have helped me get through all my difficult times. 20 years ago I left Gary after the killing of my boyfriend and sudden death of my father. I was hurt,confused, depressed, and unclear of my life path.
I moved to Orlando, Florida with a dream of becoming Makeup Artist and totally unsure on how that would happen. I believed in my dream and myself and I pursed it diligently and one day I woke up and realized I was my dream. All the while still feeling the pain, loss, and struggle of life I pressed on. I suffered a lot of depression during this time due to the pressure to succeed, keep a roof over my head and to just keep up. Oftentimes I wanted to kill myself but I just kept thinking I don’t want my Momma to find me like this so I would never do it but yet kept suffering in silence. It was hard and exhausting. One day I had enough and I decided I needed to go to therapy it changed my life. That along with my prayers and the support of my church and best friend were my saving grace; I pressed on. I did my best to move forward and get the healing I needed and most of all the healing I wanted.
One day after looking at my life I realized I needed more, I could do more I could be more but Orlando was no longer giving me that energy and challenge I needed. I decided to move to LA! I packed one huge suitcase, packed up my dog, makeup kit and made the move. Stepping on LA soil was invigorating and terrifying. I knew 2 people and those 2 people quickly became 1 and the one suddenly became 0. I was left to have faith and figure it out. LA threw me blow after blow I cried why did you do this, why did you leave Orlando things were good for you there. I Couldn’t find an apartment, or job, totaled my car ended up on public assistance for the first time in my life. It was a mess!
However finally things began to open up and turn around little by little. I eventually found an apartment for me and my dog, a job as a Nail Artist, I got a car after catching public transit and walking for 4 years and a church home. I held in to my faith. I cried so many days and nights, was confused by so many friends and opportunities and felt alone more times than I can count… but God. I held on to him. It’s been 7 years and my life has changed even more especially within the last 3 years. I started meditating to help with my depression and the limiting beliefs and eventually I really started to feel my life, energy and mind levitate. I began to see me differently, see my surroundings differently and my overall life became different. I am much better today.
Since the pandemic I made a strong pivot I started my company Find Your Lite Wellness and Events. I host meditation and yoga workshops and events as well anti- racism talks and book clubs. I have a beautiful apartment and a loving partner and most of all I have come to know who I am in a new way. I know who I am now I realize what I’m truly made of and that’s most certainly perseverance and faith. I didn’t know who I was because I was developing and in that development process it was hard to see my way and myself but through meditation and other wellness practices I have come to find out who Safia is she’s a girl, a divine being, a thoughtful, inquiring, intelligent, kind, faithful consistent person that happens to be a woman! I’m having a human experience and doing my best each and everyday.
I am a constant learner of this self and the world and for this I feel wise and move in life to show kindness love, patience, and understanding. I can’t even put into words all that I am because I’m so many things but one thing I know for sure is that I am a woman in every sense of the word.